Dear Cyn,
I am planning a surprise 40th birthday for my girlfriend. I want to make it a memorable event at a nice restaurant. Her friends are helping me plan the party and the guest list keeps growing. How do I tactfully let the guests know they will be paying for their meal and alcohol? Most of her friends would be fine with paying for their own meals so I don't think it would be a big deal. It's not a private room or anything. I just want to make sure I word it correctly on the invitations I send out.
Tim - Chino Hills
Dear Tim,
The rule of thumb is that no host (or hostess) should ever throw a party that they cannot afford. If all the budget will allow for is cake and coffee, serve that to your guests without apology. If you want to casually meet up with her friends for dinner, that's a different story. Everyone can pay their own way. But to plan a big party for your princess only to have her royal subjects pay is a smidge tacky dude.
If you are on a tight budget but still want to host a memorable event, get creative. Why not host some appetizer trays instead of paying for dinner? Negotiate with the restaurant to bring in your own dessert and dry snacks. Worst case, bring in a flask and just order diet coke. Good luck with the planning and the fact you are making this effort to plan for your gal is admirable.
See you in the city,
Cyn
